is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
