Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I think my vagina is haunted
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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