My balls are so social today.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
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