Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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