kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
