Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
