You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize
