The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
