you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
