You made me cry and you don't even care
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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