never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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