Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
