So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
