this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
