Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
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