omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
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