I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Do you remember whose house we're in?
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize