Just mADE A PArabola og urine
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
