ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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