bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
