apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
birth control should be required to get into college
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize
