I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
