This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
