Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I got inside last night via doggy door
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
My feet surprised me
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
