Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
