He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
