May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
