just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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