dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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