Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
