I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize