problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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