Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize