Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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