What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Randomize
