But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
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