So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
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