that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
i black out too much to be "responsible"
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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