You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Randomize
