I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
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