i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
