you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize
