i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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