Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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