these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
