Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
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