I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize