I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Randomize
