Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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