whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
